Before we introduced relational practice, our school felt much more reactive than proactive. Behaviour systems relied heavily on sanctions, and interactions often focused on what had gone wrong rather than what students needed. Staff were working hard, but there wasn’t a shared, consistent approach, which meant expectations varied from room to room.

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The overall environment often felt chaotic, with some poor relationships between children and staff, which limited trust and connection. Engagement in the classroom was low, and learning was frequently disrupted. Because approaches differed so much across adults, there was a noticeable lack of consistency, and at times there were genuine concerns over safety for both pupils and staff. Students who struggled with regulation were often removed from lessons, leading to a cycle of repeated incidents rather than lasting change. Conversations after behaviour issues tended to revolve around consequences instead of repair or understanding. Although many relationships between adults and pupils were positive, they were not always deep or secure. Staff confidence in managing challenging behaviour varied widely, and this inconsistency could escalate situations rather than calm them. Overall, behaviour management felt like something that happened after problems occurred, instead of being rooted in connection, predictability, and emotional safety.

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A change in leadership and Trust school review triggered the change for us.

 

When relational practice was introduced, the main expectation was to transform the school culture into one that was calmer, more consistent, and grounded in strong, positive relationships. Staff hoped that by prioritising connection over correction, pupils would feel safer, more understood, and better able to regulate their emotions.

 

A key aim was to ensure all adults used a shared, predictable approach to reduce chaos, improve behaviour, and strengthen trust between staff and pupils. It was also hoped that improved relationships would boost engagement in learning, reduce disruptions and help more children remain in the classroom.

 

Overall, the goal was to create a school environment where every child felt supported, adults felt confident and consistent, and behaviour improved through relational understanding rather than sanctions alone.

This is what we did:

 

• Introduced whole school Relational Practice (Policy) with staff training focused on consistency, predictability, and calm adult behaviour.

• Implemented shared language, calm scripts, and unified expectations across all classrooms. (Ready / Respectful / Safe rules)

• Simplified behaviour systems to ensure consistency in responses from every adult.

• Prioritised building strong adult–pupil relationships through relational check‑ins and emotionally attuned communication.

• Shifted from punitive responses to regulation focused and restorative approaches after incidents.

• Increased adult visibility during key times (transitions, breaks, corridors) to support calmness and safety.

• Developed co-regulation strategies and regulation plans for pupils who needed additional‑ support.

• Created clearer daily routines and more predictable structures to stabilise the learning environment. (Universal offer)

• Staff have had Hearts and Minds training, emotion coaching training, RRE as well as completing the Nurture UK programme.

• Implemented needs-led provision for children with more complex needs.

• Purposeful modelling by leaders of relational approach and coaching for staff as part of everyday interactions.

 

What was easy?

• Staff welcomed a calmer, more predictable approach, as many already felt the need for consistency.

• Using shared language and scripts was straightforward once introduced, giving adults confidence in knowing what to say.

• Building positive relationships came naturally to many staff, who were already nurturing and child centred‑.

• Children responded quickly to increased connection, especially to check‑ins and restorative conversations.

• Creating simple, predictable routines made classrooms feel structured and easier to manage.

• Visible adult presence helped calm corridors and transitions with immediate impact.

 

What was hard?

• Breaking old habits and moving away from punitive or reactive responses took time, repeated practice, modelling and coaching.

• Achieving true consistency across all adults was challenging, especially during busy or stressful periods.

• Staying calm in dysregulating moments required emotional regulation from staff as well as pupils.

• Embedding restorative conversations was initially difficult, as it required new skills and confidence.

• Supporting children with high levels of dysregulation demanded sustained patience, repetition, and ongoing staff capacity.

• Changing the whole school culture did not happen overnight; it required‑ commitment, reinforcement, and shared belief.

• Managing expectations—some staff hoped for instant results, but relational change takes time.

 

These days, the school is significantly calmer, with a more settled atmosphere across classrooms and shared spaces. Relationships between staff and pupils are stronger, more trusting, and more consistent. Adults are using predictable language and approaches, which has reduced confusion and improved behaviour across the school. Staff confidence has grown, especially in managing dysregulation and using restorative conversations effectively. Behaviour incidents are fewer and less intense, and pupils are increasingly able to repair and return to learning more quickly. More pupils are remaining in class, with fewer removals and improved engagement in lessons. Children feel safer and more understood, and this is reflected in calmer interactions and more positive communication.

 

The culture has shifted towards collaboration, with adults focusing on regulation, connection, and proactive behaviour planning. Routines are embedded, transitions are smoother, and adults are visibly present and supportive throughout the day. Staff are aligned in their thinking, showing shared commitment to relational practice as “how we do things here.

 

Key advice we would give to other schools is to start with the adults by building consistency, shared understanding, and calm, predictable responses. Prioritise strong relationships and connection before correction, and make sure routines and language are the same across the whole school. Stay patient — cultural change takes time — and support staff with ongoing training and reflection. Use restorative approaches to teach repair rather than punish and be visibly present during transitions to keep things calm. Above all, trust the process: consistency, connection, and calmness transform behaviour and the school environment over time.

 

Working with When The Adults Change has been a genuinely transformative experience for our school. The approach has given us clear, practical tools that have helped staff feel more confident, more consistent, and more connected in their work with children. The training was accessible and rooted in real-life‑ classroom practice, which made it easy for staff to see the relevance straight away.

 

Overall, the work has strengthened relationships across the school, improved behaviour, and given us a clear framework for supporting all children.